Street Economics 2Q 2009

It's Revenge of the Parents Time for young people who assume they can move back in after graduation. Articles offering mom and dad advice on how to get rid of the kid are popping up all over the place.

Not so long ago I sneered at the extended adolescence of young people who assumed it was socially OK to live with the parents well into their 20s. Now, instead of emailing get-rid-of-the-kids stories to friends, I'm taking a more understanding tack.

After all, unemployment nationwide is at 9.4 percent and there are many states and regions with official jobless rates well into double figures. Also, multiple reports say a scant 20 percent of this year's grads have jobs lined up. Experienced workers are duking it out with them for entry level jobs. Even MBAs are taking hits in salaries and status.

So, at least until Q3, I will forgo eye-rolling when a young person ruefully admits to cohabitating with Mum or Da because it might not be their fault.

Besides, a bit of sympathy might get me a free drink.

California v New York - The Last Word

“The quintessential thing about New York that makes it different than Silicon Valley is that people here are much more focused on the idea than the technology that is the plumbing for the idea.”

-- Media mogul Stephen Brill in The Wall Street Jounal

Translation: “New York talks a big game, but California delivers.”

I've Got A Few Questions For You, Cheney

WASHINGTON - Former Vice President Dick Cheney reiterated his praise for waterboarding Al Qaeda terrorists on Monday, calling it a "well done" technique that gathered valuable information from unusually bad guys.

- New York Daily News

Beware of Portland

People in Portland, Oregon are nice. They even spare the lives of pedestrians who step in front of their cars, which, of course, are traveling at or just under the speed limit.

This is really disconcerting to those of us who come from places like California or New York and are far more accustomed to viewing nice people through a veil of suspicion as in "What do they want from me?"

Among my recent discoveries in this vein were:

-- A bellman who actually seemed grateful for his tip.
-- A bus that halted when I attempted to cross a street with the right of way.
-- A man who asked if he could help with directions as I stared at a street sign.

Scary.

Whyi Brit Newspapers Aren't Dying - No. 2

Amusingly Ironic Headlines

"The deadly mistake of 24-hour drinking"
-- Daily Mail

The Outer Limits of E-commerce?

Bananahanger.com.

More Tough Love for Ex-Journos

The fear and trembling among journos both ex- and employed is reaching seismic proportions. Take this quite real missive I received yesterday.

"I was all bummed out last week b/c apparently everyone I socialized with (when I had a job) was at the opening for Tracy Westmoreland's new bar and I was all, "Omg nobody even TOLD ME, I am that out of the loop."

There, in just 43 words and acronyms, is the fundamental issue every ex-journo must cope with beginning the second they hit the bricks: People didn't love you, baby, they loved your job.

This is a bigger blow for out-of-work media types than it is for people in other gigs. Simply calling oneself a "writer" or "editor" and being able to back it up can provide most of the basics in life, including shelter if she let's you stay over. And for free. Therefore, missing Tracy's opening has ramifications well beyond a bruised ego.

I've found the best way to deal with suddenly becoming uncool is to get cooler than you were when you were a journo. What, you think there's no one cooler than a member of the media elite?

Most of my post-biz magazine income comes from freelancing for a private eye. (Transferable skills, eh?) So whenever some patronizing editor/PR bunny/whoever from my past asks what I'm doing, I simply hand them my business card and smile.

I got invited to a party last week. How about you?

Why Brit Newspapers Aren't Dying - No. 1

Better Stories

"A lapdancer has opted for the most dramatic of 'career' changes and become a nun."

- Daily Mail

Take The Bonus Omid, Please!

Forbes.com notes Google sales chief Omid Kordestani turned down his $1.4 million bonus in 2008. And, according to the company, "Omid also declined to receive any equity awards in 2009.”

Bad Omid. Bad Omid.

Amigo, I understand you're a billionaire and want to make a statement about -- something. But you're returning a ton of money to a company with a market cap bigger than a lot of national economies.

Think, Omid, think.

Take the dollars, take the equity, and invest it in ways that help people survive the economic collapse. Health insurance premiums? Education? Health insurance premiums? Support for non-profits trying to help? Health insurance premiums?

And, really, it's a decent tax deduction no matter how complicated your retrun.

Are we square on this Omid? Thanks, man.

The End Of A Free Press?

Let us hope the proposed Newspaper Revitalization Act never becomes law.

A seemingly well-meant attempt to prop up failing newspapers, such a law would be the beginning of the end for a free press in this country.

The legislation would allow newspapers to operate as nonprofits for educational purposes under the U.S. tax code.

They could report on all issues, including political campaigns but would be prohibited from making political endorsements. Advertising and subscription revenue would be tax exempt. Contributions to support news coverage or operations could be tax deductible.

In effect, the law would give government more than a toehold in every news paper that adopts this model. What Congress giveth, Congress can taketh away. Regardless of what anyone says, that simple fact will always be with all-too-human editors and publishers as they plan news coverage.

And if a president doesn't like what the subscribing papers say about her she can simply drop a dime on the IRS suggesting an audit of the offending publication's tax-exempt status.

Nor would this kind of help cure what's ailing newspapers: An archaic business model and declining readership.

The newspaper industry -- just like the automakers -- is paying the price for its arrogance and short-sighted attitude. Rather than prop up either one with direct or indirect subsidies, it's time to let them die off so more agile, forward-looking replacements can step in.

Bill Is Back

Secret assignments, kidnappings, brainwashing. No, they cannot stop me.

I am back.

Beware.

Is Blagojevich A Synonym for Hubris?

Not even close. See my price list below.

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Stupid Bailout Tricks: San Jose, California

"San Jose Mayor Chuck Reed says he will request 2 percent — or $14 billion — of the federal government's $700 billion bailout package."
- Associated Press

Does Reed want the money to prop up essential government services -- police, fire, etc. -- that might be cut due to property- and sales-tax shortfalls? Of course not.

"Reed says the city — the nation's 10th largest — needs the money to fund the extension of rapid transit and expand the area's clean technology businesses."

You're the man, Chuck.

Let The Auto Companies Fail

No bailout because it would only delay the inevitable.

The impact of that decision would rock the economy. But the industry's collapse could create a better economy in the future.

Every corporation would be forced to look beyond the next quarter and build enterprises that are sustainable in tomorrow's world. They failed to learn this when the "new economy" crashed. But the disappearance of an industry that in many ways symbolizes America globally would end the charade.

Much is written about the "ripple" effect of an automotive industry collapse. But the parts suppliers and the banks are all part of the manufacturers. Many would disappear, but those left would be forced to find new ways survive and prosper.

And the workers? The children of the people who worked in manufacturing would be forced to realize that the lifestyle afforded by unions and acquiescent companies is over and that education and mobility are essential to a decent life in the future. Their parents never understood that and that's why they suffer now.

Don't Ask Me To Write For Free

I don't write for free.

I could offer a long list of reasons, but they are best expressed by Harlan Ellison, one of the most prolific and creative writers of our age.

Why Golfers Get No Respect

California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger today called for a temporary 1.5-cent increase in the state sales tax to help close an $11.2 billion deficit in the state budget.

Best reaction so far:

"It is patently unfair to single out California's golfers, who already pay a fair share of taxes, and expect them to assume a disproportionate share of the revenue needed to close the state's budget deficit.

With courses suffering and golfers staying at home while the economy flounders, this is exactly the wrong time to deal a major blow to an industry that plays such an important role in California's economy."

—Bob Bouchier, executive director of the California Alliance for Golf

Sarah Palin's Next Job

Sen. Ted Stevens, R-Alaska, was convicted of lying on his federal financial disclosure forms. A felony, no less.

Sarah Palin, says, "The time has come for him to step aside. Even if elected on Tuesday, Senator Stevens should step aside to allow a special election to give Alaskans a real choice of who will serve them in Congress."

You betcha Sen. Palin.

Dumb Unions - The CTA and Gay Marriage

The California Teachers Association donated $1 million to fight a proposed constitutional amendment that would bar gay marriages.

"For us, it's a civil rights issue," said the association's President David Sanchez. "We don't believe people should be treated differently."

By "us," Sanchez must mean the union's hierarchy because it couldn't possibly have taken that stand on behalf of the CTA's primary constituency -- its members.

Forget the right or wrong of Prop. 8. Sanchez et. al. just made it more difficult for teachers to negotiate with dozens if not hundreds of conservative school boards statewide come contract time. Many of those boards govern districts where teachers are least supported and most underpaid.

Good for the union. Bad for the members. Classic.

Blind Boy's Pea Soup

This recipe was developed by legendary bluesman Blind Boy Bill Bucy to feed his band during their tours of the Mississippi Delta. Younger brother Jive reported Blind Boy's last words were, "Please, God, don't make me eat that crap in heaven."



The Notes

• 8 ozs. dried peas (one package) Do not soak prior to cooking. Uh-uh.
• 1 celery stalk chopped
• 1 large carrot chopped
• 1 small onion chopped
• 1 clove of garlic peeled and whole
• 1 bay leaf
• Dash red pepper
• Dash freshly ground black pepper
• Salt if you want it
• Ham bone or other pig meat, such as salt pork or ham ends

The Arrangement

• Place ingredients in a pot and add 8 cups of water.
• After contents come to a boil, remove pig meat and set aside.
• Continue boiling for 20 minutes.
• Reduce heat and simmer for 2-3 hours stirring occasionally.
• Cool. Yes, cool. You don't eat Blind Boy's Pea Soup right away because, like the blues, "it's gotta come from a long time back."

Refrigerate. (Couldn't take a fridge on the road back then, so Blind Boy made his girlfriend hold the pot next to her heart as they drove to the next gig.)

The Performance

The next night, chop up the pig meat, toss it in the soup pot and reheat. Best with a few Dixies and some soda crackers. Blind Boy contemporary Bo Diddley ate it with cornbread. Huh.

Street Economics Q4 - The Winners

The economy smells like tuna salad left too long in the sun. But a number of people and industries will profit from the downturn.

Some of them are visible and will become icons of hatred for all us regular folks. Right now the No. 1 voodoo doll is Robert Fuld, CEO of bankrupt Lehman Brothers, who, along with a couple of cronies, was anointed with a $20 million severance package.

But there are others that not only will survive, but prosper during the big slide while folks like us count our loose change before going to the grocery store. Some of the less-obvious winners:

Brewers -- There is a direct correlation between economic health and beer sales. When times get tough, people stop buying from Mr. Curvoisier and start buying from Messrs. Busch and Miller.

The Military -- As low-end jobs disappear, military recruitment will become easier. Yes, enlistees might get shot at, but free housing, medical care, food and clothing will make the risk more acceptable.

Birth Control Makers -- The U.S. birth rate dropped 15 percent during the Great Depression.

Retail Brokerages - They charge fees when you buy. They charge fees when you sell. Some of them charge fees when you don't do anything.

The Sex Trade -- As a professional analyst would put it, "Anticipated increases in competition will exert downward pressure on pricing. However, demand will remain at historically high levels. Therefore, we believe marketing and quality of service will be the keys to success for this industry in the near- and mid-term."