Thursday, December 11, 2008

Is Blagojevich A Synonym for Hubris?

Not even close. See my price list below.

Communicating --
Reading your emails: US$1/ea. No charge for reading your responses to emails I initiate.
Telephone calls: US$1/minute when you initiate the call. US$0.50/minute when you return my calls.*

Structured Social --
Meeting you for breakfast/lunch/coffee: Mileage**; you buy.
Meeting you for drinks: Mileage; you buy.
Meeting you for dinner: Mileage; you buy the food and wine, but I will buy my cocktails.
Attending your social engagement: Mileage; US$20/hr when food*** is served, US$30/hr without food.

Unstructured Social --
Hanging out: Mileage; US$15/hr.****
Entertainment: Mileage; you buy the tickets, food and drinks. No hourly charge.

For social interactions not listed here, please call for a quote.

I DO NOT CHARGE FOR TRAVEL TIME!

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*Surcharges may apply such as US$0.10/min for listening to you complain about former significant others. Complete rate card available on request.
**US$0.60/mile.
***When consumed in appropriate amounts, would constitute a meal as defined by a reasonable person.
****Not applicable to attending your social event.