My Failed Revolution

Bolstered by the brave millions taking to the streets in the Middle East, I ran onto the patio and loudly demanded democracy in our household -- or at least a say in a decision now and then.

Then my wife reminded me she sometimes represents nasty guys with tattoos all over their bodies and some of them owe her money.

I remain oppressed for now, but will never give up my dream of partial, semi-freedom!

I'm Rich, I'm Rich!

I just learned I won £750,000 in a BBC lottery and can get my hands on an ATM card to access $800,000. However, Western Union says I must send $5,000 to James Oborji of Benin or it will cancel my money transfer account.  At the end of the day I will be left  with $1,257,000 so I’m still happy.

Boy, am I glad I scan my email spam folder before emptying it,